this will be funnier to me than to the rest of you

My mom flew back to Tennessee today. She had been visiting So-Cal for almost a month. She stayed here with me (and my roommate, and our five animals) in my two-bedroom shoebox/duplex for the week of my finals, then went to Riverside to visit with my step-dad's mother for a week, and then came back here on Christmas Eve for my week off of work and school. It was wonderful. stressful. nice. to have her around, and it was long overdue (it's been at least four years since she came out here I think). But if you've met my mother, you know she couldn't have possibly departed without leaving just one more entertaining story behind.

8:21am - I drop Mom off at the airport. We say our awkward per usual goodbye, she scoops up her duffle bag, purse, canvas bag, and Charlie Brown Christmas Tree (which she'll later deliver to my brother as a Christmas gift), and is off... sorta... She nearly walks to the wrong airline company to drop off her baggage, but I point her back in the right direction, and then she's really off.

9:17am - I call her cell phone (the pay-as-you-go one I just got her on New Years Eve so she could talk to friends and relatives all night while my roommate and I went out with friends), and she doesn't answer. Surely she hasn't boarded yet, and her phone isn't off yet.

9:20am - She calls me back. Security shut down for some reason just as she was waiting in line, and they slightly delayed her getting through to her terminal. She's there now, and waiting to board. I tell her to call me on her layover, which I also sorta expect her to forget to do.

12:04pm - I get a message from my mom as I'm on the phone with work... she made it to Denver, is waiting to bard her next flight. By the time I call her back, the phone is off again. I'm a little proud of her for remembering how to turn the phone on and off in just the few days she's had it. Tech gear isn't exactly her thing. I leave a message asking for another call when she lands in TN.

4:15pm - The phone rings... she's made it... and can't find my step-dad, who was supposed to pick her up. She suggested to my brother that he be the one to go get her, but he had to work, so it was up to Stan. She suggested to Stan to just drive around at the pickup area and wait to see her walk out front, but he insisted that he park and meet her inside at baggage claim. She's been at the airport for almost an hour, and hasn't seen him at baggage claim or out front. We assume for the time being that he's gotten lost, and she resigns to waiting.

4:57pm - Mom again. Still no Stan. There's panic in her voice, she's tired, hungry, and worried. I'm in the car and can't help much from so far away, and ask her to hang tight until I get home, at which point I'll call her back and we'll figure out how to go about finding Stan. I hang up with her and call my brother (who's at the house in TN - Stan has no phone). We wonder about at what point we should start calling hospitals, police stations, or whoever else you call when your ride failed to show up at the airport. We agree that I'll get home in a half an hour and will start on those calls then, and he'll go borrow a neighbor's car to get Mom from the Nashville airport two hours away if need be.

5:21pm - Mom. She found him. He had gotten lost and confused driving around the airport, finally parked and made his way inside. Now they just have to find the car and get home. I call brother. Everyone's relieved.

6:49pm - Keith (brother). Calling to let me know they *just* found the car. Had to have airport security drive around and find it.

10:46pm - Mom (on her home number). Calling to say they just got home (it's 12:45am there). It took them almost two hours to find each other, and over two more hours to find their car. They had airport security helping to look for it, and eventually an airport shuttle driver had to take them out to long-term parking, which is where they finally found it.

You'd think at this point they would have just gone home... but no. When anyone in my family makes the trek to Nashville, it's a requirement that they stop at White Castle and get burgers for everyone. Mom was apparently worried they'd be closed, but luck was finally on their side. By the time they got to White Castle, they were so delirious from the ordeal that they were laughing and telling all the workers there about the adventure of the day. Okay, who am I kidding... they would have told everyone anyway, delirium or not.

The White Castle staff heated up a hot chicken dinner for my mom, who hadn't eaten all day, on the house. They were sent off with their burgers and made their way back to the middle of nowhere, save for a stop at the Cookeville Wal-Mart to get dog food.

That's my family. Not much else to say.

<3